Monday, October 25, 2010

Fall Frustrations

Well, it has been a while, yet not a lot has changed. I'm trying to be philosophical--spiritual--whatever gets me through-al! but, SHOCK, I find I am not a patient person. I've tried to take myself firmly in hand for feeling useless since my decision to put off nursing school. I have great reasons --we are still having so much trouble with Andrew/school stuff (more on this later I assure you), plus employment is necessary to actually AFFORD school (assuming I get to the point where I can actually put some back!!) But progress on every front seems so slow it feels like it might as well be standing still! I've been told repeatedly in multiple forms that I need to start considering how my future goals will mesh with my ministerial calling as an elder in the church. Seriously? Start thinking about it? I dwell on this every day. I have neither the time nor inclination to get into that theological pit at the moment-- I'm sure you are all breathing a sigh of relief.

We're still struggling with getting Andrew settled into school. The fact is, he would be ecstatic if we just homeschooled. Our fear is, the less he is socialized, the less able he IS to socialize. We feel the frustration of just not knowing how to help the little guy. The school system, quite frankly, is irritating in their condescension. If we were experts in dealing with the behavioral/social issues of autism spectrum, we certainly wouldn't be beating our fists against the wall of public education to get him the help we need, would we?? I think I exhibit marvelous patience when our decisions as parents irt our lifestyle choices, health choices, etc, are called into question, but I am close to my limit here. Then again, perhaps I am being overly sensitive. I know it happens when your own children are involved.

On the good side, progress is being made towards Tim starting chaplaincy school for National Guard. The wheels of government grind slowly, but we are used to that in the ministry as well, lol!

I'm holding on to all of my wonderful family and friends who let me vent my spleen (I love that analogy, but I have no idea why that is a good thing), who give me good advice (and keep me out of trouble), and who remind me that each and every day is a blessing -- and INDEED IT IS! God always give me what I need exactly when I need it. I was affirmed just yesterday in my decision to pursue nursing as a ministry, and I needed that reminder! I have a wonderful husband who has dinner waiting for me almost every night, and even occasionally a clean house (did I choose well or what? :) And I thank God every minute of the day for the wonderful blessings I receive from being a mom to two extraordinary, lovely, amazing children. I feel like Elisabeth gets left out with all of our focus on Andrew sometimes, but honestly after 3rd grade, 4th is smooth sailing! She loves her teacher, her class, her gifted program, her churches. She's content and that makes me content as well.

So, join me in taking a deep fall breath. I'll leave you with a few pictures to get you in the Halloween spirit.